One of the people that I really pay attention to and follow pretty religiously is Gary Vaynerchuck a.k.a. Gary Vee. He is this amazing entrepreneur who has really perfected his hustle. This man is a machine when it comes to his business and his life. He has build several successful businesses and makes it a point to be on top of developing trends. If you ask him he will tell you that he “day trades in attention and builds businesses”.
Recently Gary posted something on his Instagram account – ‘One life. One time. Way too many people aren’t acting this way.’
And I have to say this simple little meme really spoke to me. After going to Infusioncon this year and listening to the speakers talk (and Gary Vee was one of those speakers) I came home and started thinking about all of the things that I simply put off in my life. I started asking myself –
‘What do I want out of my life?’
‘What am I doing to move my dreams and goals forward?’
That first question was an easy one to answer – because I want a lot. A lot for myself and a lot for my family. Not just the tangible things either like a new car and new home but things like a happy life where we don’t stress all the time. A life where the kids and I can travel anywhere we want and they can learn new things and new culture.
And most recently a life where I can provide an environment for my son where he can feel as independent as possible when he becomes an adult. Being able to provide for him throughout his adult life as an individual with special needs.
The second question was the hard one. Because I haven’t been doing everything that I can. I haven’t been doing all that I could do to move my dreams and goals forward. And I KNOW IT!
So why is that? I mean it should be really simple right? Have dream – do what you need to in order to achieve it. Easy.
Not so easy apparently?
After sitting and thinking on this one little quote from Gary Vee I started to realize where my struggle was. It goes back to mindset, which is something that I talk about on a pretty regular basis (because it’s IMPORTANT). Having the right mindset is truly key but sometimes we get stuck in that mindset.
It’s all well and good to have a positive mindset or a mindset aimed toward achievement and goals. However, if you take no action toward creating that life then the mindset does you no good. So I started to think, well WHY if I have the right mindset am I not making progress?
FEAR. Plain and simple it’s fear.
I am absolutely fucking terrified of stepping out of my comfort zone. This nice happy place that I have gotten to. I did the work to get myself here and now I am terrified to go beyond this. I think that so many people stay stuck where they are because they are afraid of stepping out beyond what they know. I know I am.
Coming out from my comfort zone means trying something new, doing things that I have never done before and with that comes the possibility of failing. And I fear failure more than anything else. I don’t like losing, I don’t like failing… hell, who does? But ask any successful person and they will tell you that failure is often a good thing to experience.
Learning from our mistakes. You know that thing that you teach your children? It isn’t something that only applies to kids, it is relevant to all of us. When we fail, we pick ourselves up and try again – but this time with the knowledge that we gained from that failure.
But it is so hard isn’t it? Because in our warm fuzzy comfort zone we have gotten used to sitting back and letting this be our norm. And it is so scary to rock that boat, the one you spent so much time working to build. All those years of work and struggle to finally get to a place where things are good (at least most of the time) or all those years spent in your current situation – it’s become your norm. It’s what you know. It’s what you are good at.
Stepping away from that into something new brings the risk of possibly losing what you have. And THAT is what scares me the most. Losing what I worked so hard to create for myself and my family. The possibility that it could all be gone if I fail.
So why then would I risk it?
Because ‘One life. One time.’ … you only get one shot at this life. So if you want more from it then you have to be willing to take risks, to step out of that comfort zone and try new things. The worst thing I can imagine for myself is to be an old lady and look back at my life and regret not doing the things I wanted to do.
Not to mention, if I only get one life then I damn well better make sure I live that whole life. Quitting smoking was definitely a step out of my comfort zone because I FOUND comfort in smoking. But I knew that if I wanted to be around for my kiddos I needed to step away from that and quit.
Getting healthy again is also out of my comfort zone. If I want to have a full and healthy life then I can’t exactly eat chili cheese fries every day, even if I REALLY want to. Getting healthy means pushing myself to work out and train when I would rather nap or sit and watch TV.
It’s hard changing all those things that have become staples in my comfort zone.
But no one said that anything worth having would be easy.
That is why you have to really examine where you are in life. What has your comfort zone become and if you aren’t currently living your dreams and goals then you need to step out of that comfort zone and start taking action! Because nothing will change until you do!