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Health & WellnessPodcast

Breast Cancer Journey Part 2 – My Double Mastectomy

By Heather Wells Posted on October 5, 2020October 14, 2020 0 Comments 639 views

If you have been following my blog and podcast you know that in November of 2019 I was diagnosed with breast cancer. After various appointments and tests my doctor told me that she recommended I get a mastectomy.

There are some things you don't think about until you're told they're going to be taken away.

I was diagnosed with DCIS which is basically cancer cells in the ducts of your breast. The area that had those cells was pretty substantial which is why my doc recommended the mastectomy. You see, I have never been what you would call ‘well endowed'. So simply having a lumpectomy wasn't really going to work.

It would have been disfiguring. So the mastectomy was a better option aesthetically because I could get reconstruction.

So then why would I choose a DOUBLE mastectomy? If I only had cancer in one breast why have both removed?

Female doctor delivering bad news, The Single Mom Blog - My Double Mastectomy

Why choose a DOUBLE mastectomy?

I will be honest with you, hearing that I had cancer was scary. Hearing that I should have a mastectomy was traumatic. At first.

As I mentioned before I was not a big chested girl. Think pointy pancakes more than melons. And I was totally fine with that. I never wore a bra, I didn't care that they weren't big. Honestly, they were more of a nuisance to me than anything else.

Until I was told that I would need to lose one. Then they became more for some reason. Hearing that I would need to have a mastectomy made me feel something I had never experienced.

I felt like I was losing something that made me a woman. It sounds ridiculous to me even as I type it out, but that is truly how I felt.

Then immediately after hearing that my doctor asked me about the possibility of having a double mastectomy.

WHAT?!?! You want to take both of them?!?!

I almost couldn't process that. I didn't understand why she would even ask me that!

Then she started talking with me about a lot of other options and the various things I could do if I didn't do a mastectomy. A lumpectomy (which would be disfiguring), radiation treatments which had their own side effects.

Female surgeon over patient. The Single Mom Blog - My Double Mastectomy

I would rather change the way I look than worry about dying.

Ultimately after hearing all of the options I did decide on the double mastectomy and reconstruction. I did so for several reasons:

  1. There was no guarantee that a lumpectomy would get all the cancer cells and I would possibly be in the same situation in the future.
  2. I didn't want to be disfigured. I know that my breasts weren't my pride and joy BUT I didn't want them to look any wonkier than they already did.
  3. If I only did one and got the reconstruction I wouldn't match. (They don't make implants in saggy ‘I've had three kids' pointy pancake size.)
  4.  And the BIGGEST reason – I didn't want to have to worry about doing this all over again on the other side in 6 month or a year or whenever.

As a single mom I need to have the best solution with the best possible outcome and the least amount of down time. Having a double mastectomy was that option.

If you're faced with having a mastectomy, don't think you're going to come back after a week or 2. It will kick your ass.

Please be sure to listen to the podcast where I go into more detail about the surgery and recovery because it is really too much to write here.

BUT I will tell you this – if you are faced with having a mastectomy make sure you prepare yourself. Not just for the physical aspects of it but the practical ones. For some reason I thought that I would be all better and back to normal after a couple weeks.

Told my clients and friends that it was no big deal and I would be back at it in no time. NO! This is major surgery, I am not sure why I thought it wasn't. It took me months to get back to even HALF speed. So give yourself some grace, make sure you have help and here are a few other tips to help you.

  1. Buy comfortable FRONT closing sports bras. Trust me you will want out of the grandma bras as soon as your doctor tells you that you can. I got these and loved them AND still use them.
  2. Before your surgery put anything you will be needing – dishes, clothes, toiletries etc at mid level. You won't be able to lift your arms for a while.
  3. Make sure you have body cleansing wipes and dry shampoo – you will not be able to shower for a while if you have drains put in. (PS. That first shower after you have been cleared to take one is GLORIOUS)
  4. Get a bunch of front button up shirts – I got a ton of them from good will in the men's section. Again, you won't be able to lift your arms to change your shirt so button ups will be a life saver.
  5. REST. It takes longer to heal if you don't rest and let your body do the work it needs.

Your body is putting in a lot of energy to heal. It doesn't seem like it, but when you start doing other things, it makes you really tired.

 

Also, remember that even though you had to go through this, the only thing you lost is the cancer.

You have not lost your womanhood. You are still feminine. You are still YOU!

And if you get reconstruction like I did, you may even end up with better boobs than when you started. I sure did.

Above all, remember that you are doing what you need to survive and keep living. Our bodies don't make us who we are. I lost cancer. Other than that, I haven't lost anything. I'm still me.

Here are some other recent posts you may be interested in:

Recent Posts

  • How To Get Our Of Your Own Way
  • Can Your Life Change If You Change Your Thoughts?
  • What Does It Take To Be a Good Mom?
  • Breast Cancer Journey Part 2 – My Double Mastectomy
  • Overcoming Overwhelm: Brain Dump and Prioritize

*This post may contain affiliate links to products or services that I recommend. I do receive compensation for products ordered, however that does not reflect the price you pay for the items.

XOXO
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Heather Wells
Heather is a single mother living in beautiful Colorado. She has 3 wonderful children; twin 20 year old young men and a 13 year old daughter. She has lived in Colorado for the better part of her life and is a stay at home work at home mother. She started her own business over 12 years ago and is happily, albeit precariously, balancing her work and personal lives. She spent over 8 years struggling financially and emotionally as a single parent before discovering how shifts in mindset and attitude can bring forth amazing changes in her life. Now her mission is to help other single moms stop the constant struggle and start creating success in their lives through the Single Mom Blog and Podcast.
Breast Cancer Journey Part 2 – My Double Mastectomy

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Welcome!

Welcome!

I'm Heather and I am a single mother to 3 amazing children. I started this blog to help other single moms like me find inspiration, support, ideas and hopefully a few laughs. I am glad that you are here - remember you are not alone!

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Instagram Followed by: 376 | Follow Me!

Tap the link in my bio for more info -> @singlemomblogger⁣
Do you ever get in your own dang way? How often could we be the cause of some of our own problems? Yes, we all can have some crappy times but do we sometimes sabotage our goals? This podcast episode is all about self-sabotage and how to stop getting in your own way. Head over to the blog to check it out!

4 1

Tap the link in my...

Today I am wearing pearls. I wear them in honor of RBG and all the work she did for equality and women\'s rights. She was a champion for equality and I will forever be grateful to her.  I also wear them to honor my cousin. These were hers. She passed away from meningitis years ago. I haven\'t been able to bring myself to wear them before now because they made me sad. But today I do. I know if she were alive today she would be passionately voicing her opinion and just as passionately telling people to vote.  Our democracy is important and it requires our active participation. VOTE!
#vote2020 #vote #usemyvoice #iwillusemyvoice #thesinglemomblog #singlemom #singlemomblog #thissinglemomrocks #democracy #yourvoicematters

10 1

Today I am wearing pearls....

Was not feeling well yesterday and missed posting this for #nationaldaughtersday . My beautiful girl who is just growing up too damn fast for my liking. 
.
.
No matter the struggles we go through, you are one of the most important people in my life and I love you so much.
.
.
You are growing into such a powerful young woman I don\'t think you even realize how strong and amazing you are. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. 
.
.
Your beautiful soul and giving heart is what makes you so stunning. I am so proud of who you are becoming. Keep seeking the beautiful and positive things in this world.

13 2

Was not feeling well yesterday...

I am gutted. This woman was such a bad ass. She was a pioneer for women everywhere. 
.
.
One of very few women to attend Harvard Law at that time, the first woman to be on Harvard and Columbia law review. Asked by the dean of Harvard \"why she was at Harvard taking what should be a man\'s place\" 😡
.
.
In 1970, she co-founded the Women\'s Rights Law Reporter, the first law journal in the U.S. to focus exclusively on women\'s rights. She was a champion for women\'s rights!
.
.
The Notorious RBG. This country mourns your loss. And now more than ever it is important that we #vote
.
.
.
#notoriousrbg #rbg #restinpeace #supremecourt #ruthbaderginsburg #idissent #vote #usemyvoice #iwillusemyvoice #thesinglemomblog #singlemom #singlemomblog #singlemom #womenempowerment #womensrights

10

I am gutted. This woman...

I tell my daughter all the time that we train people how to treat us. If we allow disrespect there are those who will continue to disrespect us because we have allowed it. ⁣
.⁣
.⁣
We need to BELIEVE that we are worth the best and we deserve good things. If we don\'t then others will see that and think they can follow suit.⁣
.⁣
.⁣
Know your worth mama!

7 1

I tell my daughter all...

You are not lazy, unmotivated or stuck. After years of survival mode, you are exhausted. There\'s a difference. .
.
YES!!! I have been feeling this to my core lately. After almost 20 years of being a single mom, raising a special needs son, dealing with ex\'s and their BS...I am exhausted. .
.
I have struggled through and lived in survival mode for so long now and there is only so long you can do that before it wears you down.
.
.
So mama, if your body is crying out for a break, if your soul is screaming for it...just know that it is totally ok to take that break. .
.
The dishes can wait for a bit, the laundry will be there later, the floors can be vacuumed next week, no it ISN\'T the endof the world if the kids have cereal for dinner. Give yourself some grace honey. You have more than earned it.
.
.
 #weekendvibes #momlife #singlemom #mommyblogger #thesinglemomblog #thesinglemompodcast #singlemommylife #singlemomsrock #rest #parentingblogger #parentingishard #selfcare

25 3

You are not lazy, unmotivated...

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Follow Me On Instagram! Followed by: 376 | Follow Me!

Tap the link in my bio for more info -> @singlemomblogger⁣
Do you ever get in your own dang way? How often could we be the cause of some of our own problems? Yes, we all can have some crappy times but do we sometimes sabotage our goals? This podcast episode is all about self-sabotage and how to stop getting in your own way. Head over to the blog to check it out!

4 1

Tap the link in my...

Today I am wearing pearls. I wear them in honor of RBG and all the work she did for equality and women\'s rights. She was a champion for equality and I will forever be grateful to her.  I also wear them to honor my cousin. These were hers. She passed away from meningitis years ago. I haven\'t been able to bring myself to wear them before now because they made me sad. But today I do. I know if she were alive today she would be passionately voicing her opinion and just as passionately telling people to vote.  Our democracy is important and it requires our active participation. VOTE!
#vote2020 #vote #usemyvoice #iwillusemyvoice #thesinglemomblog #singlemom #singlemomblog #thissinglemomrocks #democracy #yourvoicematters

10 1

Today I am wearing pearls....

Was not feeling well yesterday and missed posting this for #nationaldaughtersday . My beautiful girl who is just growing up too damn fast for my liking. 
.
.
No matter the struggles we go through, you are one of the most important people in my life and I love you so much.
.
.
You are growing into such a powerful young woman I don\'t think you even realize how strong and amazing you are. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. 
.
.
Your beautiful soul and giving heart is what makes you so stunning. I am so proud of who you are becoming. Keep seeking the beautiful and positive things in this world.

13 2

Was not feeling well yesterday...

I am gutted. This woman was such a bad ass. She was a pioneer for women everywhere. 
.
.
One of very few women to attend Harvard Law at that time, the first woman to be on Harvard and Columbia law review. Asked by the dean of Harvard \"why she was at Harvard taking what should be a man\'s place\" 😡
.
.
In 1970, she co-founded the Women\'s Rights Law Reporter, the first law journal in the U.S. to focus exclusively on women\'s rights. She was a champion for women\'s rights!
.
.
The Notorious RBG. This country mourns your loss. And now more than ever it is important that we #vote
.
.
.
#notoriousrbg #rbg #restinpeace #supremecourt #ruthbaderginsburg #idissent #vote #usemyvoice #iwillusemyvoice #thesinglemomblog #singlemom #singlemomblog #singlemom #womenempowerment #womensrights

10

I am gutted. This woman...

I tell my daughter all the time that we train people how to treat us. If we allow disrespect there are those who will continue to disrespect us because we have allowed it. ⁣
.⁣
.⁣
We need to BELIEVE that we are worth the best and we deserve good things. If we don\'t then others will see that and think they can follow suit.⁣
.⁣
.⁣
Know your worth mama!

7 1

I tell my daughter all...

You are not lazy, unmotivated or stuck. After years of survival mode, you are exhausted. There\'s a difference. .
.
YES!!! I have been feeling this to my core lately. After almost 20 years of being a single mom, raising a special needs son, dealing with ex\'s and their BS...I am exhausted. .
.
I have struggled through and lived in survival mode for so long now and there is only so long you can do that before it wears you down.
.
.
So mama, if your body is crying out for a break, if your soul is screaming for it...just know that it is totally ok to take that break. .
.
The dishes can wait for a bit, the laundry will be there later, the floors can be vacuumed next week, no it ISN\'T the endof the world if the kids have cereal for dinner. Give yourself some grace honey. You have more than earned it.
.
.
 #weekendvibes #momlife #singlemom #mommyblogger #thesinglemomblog #thesinglemompodcast #singlemommylife #singlemomsrock #rest #parentingblogger #parentingishard #selfcare

25 3

You are not lazy, unmotivated...

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